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 A Tribute to Tribute BandsBy Graham Carter, 2008It was John Lennon who said "Nothing is real", but even he couldn't have predicted how much this would come to define showbusiness, less than 30 years after his death. Tomorrow night, a tribute band called The Counterfeit Police appear at the Wyvern Theatre. This is hardly unusual because countless such acts have played there in recent years, and there are literally hundreds of them on the entertainment circuit. Even The Wurzels and Chas 'n' Dave have two tribute bands each. But it's ironic that the £16 ticket price for seeing people impersonating The Police tomorrow is probably about the same as I paid, 20 years ago, to see the real thing. The best thing about tribute bands are their names. It probably all started with The Hee Bee Gee Bees, but they weren't so much a tribute band as a spoof, and the standard was really set by Abba replicas Bjorn Again. By the way, there are now at least 16 Abba tribute bands in the UK alone. My other favourites include: By Jovi, Pink Fraud, The Illegal Eagles, Queen B, Once More Into The Bleach (Blondie), Dire Fakes, Claptonite (Eric Clapton), Robbing Williams, Sample Minds, Fake That, The Likeness (The Darkness) and Westlike. Even better are Not Chocolate, Surely Bassey, Nearvana, Gimme Hendrix, Fleetwood Bac and Jamirrorquai. You also see themes developing, so there are The Rolling Clones and The Clone Roses, but sadly not Patsy Clone. Not yet, anyway. Others are inspired by appropriate songs, such as The Great Pretender (Freddie Mercury), Could It Be Manilow, Living in the Past (Jethro Tull) and One Step Behind (Madness). Sometimes, bands just haven't quite got it. There are more Elvis impersonators in the world than pebbles on the beach, and the worst named must be Elvin Priestley. In the same vein there is Big O Vations (Roy Orbison), U2-II (surely that should have been U3?), Green-ish Day, Straight as Quo, The Red Mock Chili Peppers and - worst of the lot - a Neil Diamond act called... wait for it... Double Diamond! Some bands sound like tribute bands but aren't - like The Pretenders and The Shadows. And I can't tell you how disappointed I was to discover that Geoff Leppard don't actually exist, having been made up. In other words, they are a fake fake band. But it has given me an idea for a game that could provide hours of fun on dark winter nights when you can't afford to go and see a tribute band. Just make up your own. You could have The Next Pistols, Againinem or even Ronan Cheating. This was my weekly column in the Swindon Advertiser on February 12, 2008. Return to main Words page |